Being 5% Human
My kitchen was a disaster and I was exhausted.
Yesterday was out of balance from the minute I woke up. Actually… it started the night before when I laid down to sleep. A chain of events threw me out of my new routine and scrambled my day pretty good. By the time daycare closed and the house was quiet, I was burnt out.
I went to the kitchen to start dinner and realized I hadn’t finished the dishes. The kitchen wasn’t in order to cook. I felt defeated.
So I made the choice to cut myself some slack — but move inside that decision intentionally.
I ordered a small pizza from Casey’s. I didn’t order anything else. I skipped the kombucha I wanted and drank water instead.
I could have stopped there and beat myself up for “falling,” but I didn’t. I allowed myself to be human — with real human limits and real-life interruptions. Life is going to throw things at me. I have to learn how to duck and dodge. That is exactly what I did last night.
I ordered the pizza. I ate the pizza. But everything else I did was intentional and aligned with growth.
I chose water.
I chose fiber capsules before eating.
I added ½ cup of cottage cheese for extra protein.
I did 30 minutes of light to moderate movement on the stability ball while listening to a Mel Robbins podcast.
I took a shower to calm my nervous system.
I drank hot tea while working on revamping my website.
I monitored my blood sugars without panic.
I chose me.
The results absolutely blew my mind.
Yes, I had a surge. It peaked at 289 — but it never crossed 300. And I felt like trash. That feeling was actually clarifying. It confirmed what I’ve suspected: my blood sugar has been the underlying issue for a long time.
After several weeks of intentionally lowering my numbers and living in a recovery state, I didn’t even realize how much better I had been feeling… until I felt the contrast.
Wow.
What an eye opener.
The issue wasn’t pizza.
The issue was friction.
Dirty kitchen.
Low energy.
High activation cost.
So what’s today’s plan?
Clean the kitchen so I win today.
That’s Phase 2 for me:
Design the environment.
Lower friction.
Reduce reliance on willpower.
This isn’t about dieting.
It’s about becoming the kind of person who stays in the game.
I’m not chasing perfection anymore.
I’m building structure and self-trust.
OH YEAH… The most impressive thing in all of this… My fasting blood sugar was 195 this morning!!! Under 200 for the first time in over a year!!! I am healing!!!
Journaling Prompts:
Where in my life am I relying on willpower instead of improving my environment?
When I “slip,” do I spiral — or do I stay engaged and intentional?
What small structural change can I make today that will make tomorrow easier?
