Sick AGAIN!
Not gonna lie… I am pretty upset that I am sick again.
Heavy chest. Burning cough. Thick sinuses. Fatigue.
And honestly? I have shit to do.
I seriously do not have time for this. It’s only March and I’m already considering using one of my last two paid sick days for the year tomorrow. Ugh.
Friday night I slept like crap. As Saturday went on I felt worse and worse, so dinner ended up being pizza from Casey’s because I simply did not have the energy to cook.
My sink is full of dishes and there is no cooking happening in that kitchen today because I don’t have the energy to clean it either.
So… pizza late at night, being sick, and barely sleeping.
Guess what my fasting blood sugar was this morning?
250.
And I’ll be honest, that number made my mind start spinning.
I feel like I’ve been sliding backwards all month trying to get these taxes done. Falling back into old habits because I’m facing consequences of choices I made last year.
My body is struggling right now, and my mind is right there with it.
I haven’t abandoned my goals, but I’m definitely not working them the way I want to or the way I know I need to.
It feels like such a cliché to say, “Once these taxes are done I can get back into my routine.” But that’s exactly where I’m at right now.
The deadline is here. Today.
I’m supposed to be handing everything over to my accountant.
And right now… that feels impossible.
What I should be doing is resting. Healing. Letting my body recover.
But instead I’m sitting here trying to figure out how to stay upright long enough to sort numbers all day.
My body aches. My head and chest feel heavy. I’m exhausted.
All I really want to do is take a hot shower and crawl back into bed.
But life doesn’t pause just because you feel like trash.
I know this probably sounds like whining. Maybe it is a little.
But you know how it is when you feel awful and the world just keeps moving like nothing is wrong.
And on top of that, I’m worried my daycare families are going to be frustrated if I call in again tomorrow.
But the truth is… I’m sick.
And right now I’m just over it.
And maybe this is part of the journey too.
Not the pretty, motivational, “look how well everything is going” part.
The messy part.
The part where you’re sick, exhausted, overwhelmed, and still trying to show up anyway.
Some days the win isn’t crushing your goals or sticking to the perfect routine.
Some days the win is simply not quitting.
So today I’m going to take my hot shower, jump in the sauna, drink my hot tea, work on these taxes the best I can, and take care of my body while I do it.
Because this journey was never about perfection.
It was always about showing up honestly, even on the hard days.
And today is definitely one of those days.
Journaling Prompts
When I feel like I am falling behind or sliding backwards, what thoughts or fears start showing up in my mind?
What does “showing up for myself” look like on days when my body and mind are both struggling?
Looking back at difficult seasons in my life, what helped me keep moving forward even when things felt overwhelming?
