Forgiveness & Healing

Forgiveness & Self-Love have to happen for real healing

I’m not entirely sure what pulled me toward this quote today, but I’m leaning into it.

Forgiveness.
This one is complicated. Layered. Heavy in ways that are hard to explain.

I feel like I’ve forgiven the people in my life that I needed to. And yet, every so often, unhealed memories surface and I realize there is still pain there—sometimes even anger. It’s hard to know when you’ve truly let go. Hard to know when forgiveness is complete.

Forgiving myself is where I struggle the most.

Being the person who hurt my kids. Making decisions that still affect their lives daily because I wasn’t mature enough to be the mom they deserved. This one cuts deep—right into my soul.

I try to forgive myself for the mistakes I made while they were growing up, but watching them struggle as adults makes that feel almost impossible. These are the three people I love most in this world. Knowing that some of their pain and challenges came from choices I made… that is incredibly hard to sit with, let alone forgive.

I know I am human.
I know I did the best I could with what I knew at the time.
I know every parent makes mistakes—big and small.

But these are my kids. And some of their emotional and mental wounds came from me.

Yes, I was broken too. But I repeated patterns instead of healing them—and those patterns didn’t stop with me. I passed them on.

And still…
All three of my kids are kind.
All three of my kids are loving, caring people.
All three of my kids stand up for themselves—even when it’s uncomfortable.

They are good humans.

I also recognize that not all of life’s trauma is my fault. Some pain simply comes from living. But the mistakes that are mine—the wounds I caused—that’s what I can’t seem to move past.

If I’m being honest, this is probably an area of healing where I need professional support to truly work through it. I’m just not ready to go that deep yet. Maybe when my day-to-day life feels more stable. Maybe when my habits are healthier. Maybe when I have a little more strength.

Today isn’t that day. And tomorrow probably isn’t either.

But someday.

So I’ll ask—gently and openly:
Do any of you have advice on forgiving yourself?